Fleetwood Mac Forum

This week, my mum was diagnosed to have Alzheimer's.
I am not going to go into all the details, but after being just somewhat forgetful for a couple of months, she deteriorated really fast over the last 4 weeks.
When we left on our holiday on august 22nd i could still have a normal conversation with her even though she was a bit depressed and kept forgetting what you told her. When i talked to her on the phone a couple of days later, she was crying, and somehow i felt as if i was saying goodbye to her.
We came home a couple of days sooner than planned and it turned out that my gut feeling was right.
She slept most of the day, could not remember a thing and seemed very depressed.
They had been to a neurologist and some tests had been done but the results were not in yet.
Then last weekend she turned aggressive towards my dad twice, said she saw people who wanted to hurt her and steal her money (we spent half a day searching for her wallet which was supposedly stolen but was found at the back of a drawer).
Sunday evening i got an emergency call from my dad crying for my help. She had attacked him again and fallen down on the floor and could not get up anymore.
So i called the ambulance and she was hospitalized that same night.
In the meantime she has slowly improved from not knowing me or my dad, to telling me this afternoon how she has felt these past months : thinking that she was going crazy and not wanting to tell us
because she was terrified that she would be put away in a mental asylum for the rest of her life.
Going back home is out of the question and my dad who will be 80 in december has Parkinson's and on top of that he has lost 30 pounds due to all the stress of the past weeks. So today he has decided that he wants to go to a retirement home for the elderly, together with my mum. This morning we went to visit a home that has a double room vacant on october 1st, and he told me this evening that i can go ahead
and arrange everything for them to move in as soon as possible.
We told my mum that they would be going to a hotel and stay there for the rest of their lives, and she was so relieved and happy that she could finally stop cooking,cleaning,washing etc. ! And most important; that she and dad would stay together. So part of me is happy because of that and part of me is sad because i suddenly realize that they will not be around for ever. Ofcourse we all know that about our parents, but this last week it has really hit me in the face , and hard.
I do not know if we will be able to go to New York to see LB in october, because i am an only child and will have to make all the arrangements for my parents, but then so be it. If we cannot make it, i'll let you know what seats we had in NY en Glenside. They're pretty good and then someone else might as well use them.
This is also the first time this week that i have been able to find time to check my mail and scan what has been happening on The Chain.
I missed Betsy's birthday : sorry Betsy, i'll make it up to you, promise.
I also missed the start of the book reading. I had started reading the first story when the shit hit the fan, and i'll try to keep up with you guys, but do not shoot me if i do not find the time right now to post.
And please, if you notice that your parent starts to forget important stuff, or more things than usual : take them to a neurologist straight away. Do not wait until it's too late. They will not tell you because they
are ashamed and afraid, but the sooner the diagnose, the sooner they can start taking the medication and prevent fast deterioration.

I am so sorry to hear about your mother. Alzheimer's is such an ugly disease, it just robs a person of everything from who they are to what they know - and it's horribly frightening for the person as well as those close to them.

My grandma is in the beginning stages, but has also been diagnosed...so I know how hard it is.

I'll keep you and your family in my thoughts.

So sorry to hear this.

My thoughts are with you Suzy and I hope things work out for them in their new place. I can only imagine how hard it is for all of you right now.

Hang in there and keep us posted when you can.

This is an awful thing

One can only hope that their new situation is the best for them, and that it works out as well as possible for both your mum and your dad, and for you too. I can't imagine what it must be like for you, but I know we're all thinking of you

my heart was just crushed reading this, and i'm sorry you have to go through this horrible thing alone. you know you always have your chain friends to bounce things off of and we'll be here for you. i'm glad that your parents can stay in the same home, and that really might take some strain off of them and they can just enjoy their time left together.

so you think it was just the past couple of months? can alzheimer's progress that quickly from just forgetting things, to not knowing who someone is in a matter of months?

i ask because my mom is fairly young but she had a conversation with me a few weeks ago about how her worst fear is to get alzheimer's and ever hurt me by not knowing who i am. she said (while crying) she'd been forgetting things a lot lately but i just brushed it off and told her she's been under a lot of stress. well, when we went to say goodbye, we hugged, i got on the car and she said "oh wait, you didn't give me a hug". i was freaking out, but didn't have the heart to tell her we just had a few seconds ago.

so so sorry to hear this. you'll be in my thoughts.

Suzy, I am really sorry to hear this... You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

I'm so sorry

Alzheimer's took both of my grandmothers, so I know what it's like. It's completely heartbreaking. I would be with one of my grandmothers and I could tell she knew who I was somewhere in her brain, but it wasn't connecting. It was so sad.

I wish only the best.

I'm so very sorry, Suzy.

Suzy, I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. But that is really great that she and your dad will get to move into a place together. It will probably be good for him, too, with his Parkinson's. My grandpa has Alzheimer's. Luckily, he has not declined too much since he's been on medication for it. It's a tough disease.

Michelle, I don't know how old your mom is, but I don't think Alzheimer's only happens to the elderly. If she is forgetting a lot, I would convince her to get checked out. She wanted you to get looked at for your stomach, so surely she would get checked out if you asked her and told her some of the things you've noticed. If it is Alzheimer's, the sooner she can get on medication the better. It really slows the deterioration, a LOT.

I'm so sorry Suzy. It is an awful disease. My great grandmother had Alzheimers. Sometimes she was hilarious. Sometimes she was heart breaking. She wound up passing about a year ago after a real long struggle with it. She lived with my grandparents in her really bad stages of it. She never recognized my mom, my daughter, or myself. And she would always tell my daughter that she was the most beautiful little girl she's ever seen. Every time. It was cute. And if someone pissed her off, every time, she would sit and say "get the gun..." haha! Of course, there was no gun to get, and we'd get a giggle. There are a few stories we could tell when she was bad, but not real bad, and they always give us all a smile, but toward the end it was really bad. It's not a disease to laugh about, though, and some aren't as comical as my grammy was. She finally got to a violent stage, and was nearly childlike most of the other time.

I'll be praying for your parents, Suzy. They have a quite a road ahead of them.

This. The hugging especially worries me a bit. Please have her get it checked out.

Thank you all for the support and kind words It warms my heart.
And Michelle; yes it can progress that fast. My mum's doctor told me it can even happen over a time span of a weekend!
Also, like Camchristo said : it is not only for the elderly, it can also happen to people in their 40's or early 50's. Her forgetfullness could be caused by stress or fatigue,but it could also be a sign that something is terribly wrong. My mum knew something was wrong and that she was causing my dad grief, but she stayed quiet about it out of fear and shame. Do not let this happen to your mother : talk to her and convince her to go see a neurologist and get it checked.
It will probably be alright but you better make sure...

Michelle, PLEASE have your mom checked out. It could be nothing, hopefully, but it is a great idea just to get checked out.

Sorry to hear this Suzy.